20. Excuse the Hell Out of Me...

We were all driving. Robert was very quiet. I turn around and ask, "Robbie, are you okay honey?"

"It's ROBERT," he responds emphatically.

Fuck. Excuse the hell out of me. This is what I thought, not said.

19. The things they learn...

Robert had this really long balloon. While standing on the sofa, he was trying to hit the fan with it.

"Robert, stop or you're going to fall," says grandma.

Robert is still trying to hit the fan.

"Robert, stop it or you'll fall."

Robert get off the sofa, hits grandma on her legs with the balloon and says under his breath, "You idiot."

Whaaaaat???? We don't say "idiot" at home.

Later, as Robert was writing his ABCs he kept saying, "you idiot." I don't know if he meant himself. BUT if an adult at school, called Robert an idiot, and I hear about it, waterboarding will seem like a vacation.

18. True Love...

Robert RUNS into the room the other day and says really loud, "MOM?"

"Yes honey."

"I LOVE YOU."

Awww... so sweet... my baby loves his mama...

"I love you too baby."

Fast forward two days. I thought I'd turn the tables on him, "Robbie?"

He looks at me.

"I LOVE YOU."

He turns away, "Yeah..."

That's true love right there.

17. Who's Fooling Whom?

Robert has definitely learned to ask for things he wants.

"I want a blue cookie," this from the kid who HATED sweets.

I pick up the cookie but before handing it to him I ask, "If I give you a cookie, will you write?"

Robert has been REFUSING to pick up a pencil at home.

Immediate answer, "Yes."

Half way through eating his cookie, I ask Robert, "Robert are you going to write?"

"NO!"

That's what I get for giving him the cookie first. And we all think he doesn't know anything. Hah!

Who's got who fooled?!??!?